Happiness is..... contentment. I want so much out of life but I fail to realize that I can't have it all. What if life was meant to be the way it is? I can't figure out why I feel like shat one day and good the other. I need to be kept busy to keep my mind from thinking so much.
"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God."Phil 4:6
I want to trust god fully but it's so hard at times. I mean He always does provide. There has to be a reason for everything I am going through.
I feel like I'm becoming more of an F, which is just like wtf but really I think I might be a softy hiding behind a strong exterior of confidence. But T's have feelings too right. I think I feel anxious because I'm a T. I never want to do something that I might regret.
"But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, 14 I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.15 All of us who are mature should take such a view of things. And if on some point you think differently, that too God will make clear to you. 16 Only let us live up to what we have already attained."
I even know the solutions to my own problems. Yet I still am scared of regret.
I think my problem is that I over think things. I can't stand it when I don't have control over situations. I feel so weak and I end up wanting to just forget about it. I always want a solution to a problem. The thing is what if there is no exact solution but only theories. I hate wasting life and time thinking about things that are not solid.
So I guess I just need to count my blessing and really realize that God will provide me with everything that I need. Being hasty is a waste of life.
No I'm not the man I used to be lately.
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i love you so much bob... you have no idea. i know im a couple hundred miles away frmo you but i always got your back. stay strong and keep putting that faith into use.
ReplyDeleteCoherent. Not fragments. gg.
ReplyDelete:).
why does there have to be reasons for everything you are going through? shit happens.
ReplyDeleteMm.. I deal with the same struggle of wanting control and THINKING that I have the ways to solve my problems.. in most ways, it is just my prideful heart that is so hardened to let go of my self-abilities and really giving it up to God. I say I trust him, but then I still secretly want a bit of control.. Be real with God because he already knows the wants of your heart!
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